Never work out again! Thanks Bliss!

That’s right folks… no more workouts for us. No more sweatin’. No more exhaustion all in the name of getting fit.  Nope. .  We. Are. Done.

I am sitting here at work and found a Bliss catalog.  I love their lotion, so I am turning pages.. turning pages.. and there on page 36 is the answer to all of our prayers. FATGIRLSLIM products! Fat…. Girl…..Slim

Here’s what they say at the top of the page:

At Bliss, we don’t buy into dietary deprivation….. First life’s too short to pass up the pumpkin pie and second we’ve got a family of formulas with seriously effective ‘thin’-grediants that’ll keep your belly from turning into that proverbial ‘bowl of jelly’.

SERIOUSLY.. it says that!

Here’s some of the products:

FatGirlScrub:  Diminsh the appearance of bumps and ensure maximum effects from the formulas that follow

FatGirlSlim:  It’s the daytime dimple dashing dynamo! It somes with encapsulated caffeine!

Oh and make sure you pick up your LoveHandler: Liquid workout for the lazy abdominals, with caffeine and lipid-release boosters.

And lastly FatGirlSleep:   a potent PM version of FatGirlSlim cream.

Okay, I get it. A lot of lines sell firming creams, cellulite busters, etc. I know that and I understand that. And as much as I feel badly for all the size  4 women out there with cellulite and jiggly thighs (No!! Save them!!) I have to think that the people of Bliss could have come up with a better name for their products… no? Am I wrong?

Oh and here is something from a corner of the page from Dr Ava Shamban: The theory behind Caffeine is that it actually can reduce fat. It can enhance fat metabolism and also reduce some of the edema or swelling that we get around the fat, so the skin appears smoother.

Note to self: Tomorrow at Starbucks make that an iced Venti Americano with 12 extra shots of espresso.

So anyone have any ideas of better names for these Bliss products, or maybe just better products? Leave them in the comments section.

My idea- Chop Those Thighs Off and They Won’t Jiggle Anymore Cream:  Its the anticeptic cream you put on the open wound left after chopping off the thighs.

Dont forget: Leave your comments!

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2 responses to “Never work out again! Thanks Bliss!

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